Category Archives: Meditation

Education, Meditation

Chapel Street

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It’s hard to find, but it’s well travelled, linking Main street to Marion road. It’s only two hundred yards long, and most people think it’s part of Marion road. Its sign is at the bottom of the hill, rarely given a glance by the thousands that pass it daily. Chapel as a street in its own right has virtually disappeared, overtaken by the two roads it connects.

There’s no chapel on Chapel, and I’m not sure how many houses there are. Only two are certain – the others are on its corners, facing High street or Main. Four driveways open onto Chapel, so perhaps there are four with a Chapel address. It hardly matters, except for mail delivery and voter registration. Yet Chapel street remains its own entity. A steep hill between Main and High, turning into Marion road at the light.

I don’t know what the kids walking home from school think about Chapel street, or the drivers heading to work. It’s a means to another end for most, a destination for only a few who live or visit its houses. And yet, it’s named a house of prayer. At some point, Chapel was sacred ground, a place to come into God’s presence, a refuge. When I walk up the hill, I wonder how often I’ve marched straight across sacred ground without a thought or a pause. When I walk down the hill, God’s beloved are before me, in their cars and on their feet. How often do I see them without really seeing them?

How often? That’s a sacred question. I guess there still is a chapel on Chapel.

 

Question: Does your town have a sacred/chapel street?

Meditation

Storm Damage

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Hurricane Arthur blew through town yesterday, bringing a lot of rain and some high winds. It came up the coast right after storms blew in from the west. Fortunately, the sun was shining in a cloudless sky by the time I took my walk this morning. The only signs of yesterday’s storms in my yard were a couple of bent hollyhocks and corn stocks. High and Main streets had a few puddles in the road and some small branches on lawns – nothing remarkable. It could have been so much worse.

Only one tree on High street lost a huge limb. I didn’t notice it at first because it hadn’t fallen all the way to the ground. I saw it because of the color difference between the outside and inside parts of the tree – the light inner wood showed up against the ivy covered bark. The break wasn’t a clean split, but something resembling the damage in termite infested wood. Arthur wasn’t strong enough to damage healthy trees, but was enough to fracture this one. The true damage came from ivy; the tree is covered in it, from ground to top, enclosing the trunk and all the limbs. Over many years, the tree died as the ivy sent its roots into the wood. There is no living tree beneath the ivy now. Only the strength of the ivy keeps the tree upright and intact – short one branch, thanks to Arthur. It’s just a matter of time before the tree comes down, falling under the weight of the ivy or cut down by a tree surgeon. Either way, High street is poorer for its death.

Appearances can be deceiving. Internal damage, spiritual destruction, isn’t always visible. Sometimes it’s covered in vitality, giving every appearance of health while slowly killing true life. Outer growth can come from a robust inner life, deeply rooted and strong; it can also be something that causes and masks damage, slowly draining the spirit until there is nothing left but a facade. It’s only when a storm comes that the truth is revealed.

There’s ivy growing in my yard. Like many things, it’s wonderful in small amounts but deadly if allowed to take over. I keep an eye on it and spend a lot of time cutting it back when necessary. The tree on High street and my own yard remind me to keep an eye on my inner life as well as what thrives on the surface. Storms blow through, and the truth is revealed: will it be life or death?

Meditation, Theology, Uncategorized

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Final Meditation

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Teach me how to pray. Pray thou thyself in me.   Amen.

This prayer ends with words very similar to “Prayer at the Beginning of the Day,” also by Philaret of Moscow. Since I already wrote something, I asked my friend, Bill Albritton, if he’d do the honors…

In Mere Christianity old friend C.S. Lewis writes:

“An ordinary simple Christian kneels down to say his prayers. He is trying to get in touch with God…God is the thing to which he is praying – the goal he is trying to reach. God is also the thing which is pushing him on – the motive power. God is also the road or bridge along which he is being pushed to that goal. So that the whole threefold life of the three-personal Being is actually going on in that ordinary little bedroom where an ordinary man is saying his prayers.”( Lewis, C.S.; Mere Christianity, New York: Touchstone; Simon & Schuster, 1996)

God praying in us, God praying on our behalf, God listening to our praying. Yet at the same time, we remain ourselves – not dissolved into God, but very much ourselves in our praying. Perhaps that’s what prayer really is: God being God, we being who we are, held by love in time and space.    Amen.

Meditation, Prayer, Theology

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Thirteen

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I have no other desire than to fulfil thy will.

 On a deep level, this is the truth of my life. These are the words, this is the path, leading to the reign of God here and now. I am myself most truly when I am God’s most willingly. I pray this line sincerely.

On a superficial level, this isn’t true. I have other things I want to have or do. I’d like to set the terms for what a holy life is. I’d really like the will of God to be a bigger version of my own will. I pray this line half-heartedly.

How do I reconcile my deep and superficial desires? Praying this line moves me to reframe the whole thing. I’m praying not for God’s will to be a bigger version of my own, but for my will to be a miniature version of God’s. In this time, this place, and my life, may my will be a clear reflection God’s will. I pray this line always.

Biblical Reflection, Education, Meditation, Prayer

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Twelve

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I put all my trust in thee.

 As for those who in the present age are rich, command them not to be haughty, or to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but rather on God who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, generous, and ready to share, thus storing up for themselves the treasure of a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of the life that is really life. (I Tim 6:17-19, NRSV)

 

My parents aren’t perfect, but they are trustworthy. What they promise, they make good on. If circumstances prevent them from keeping a promise, they do their best to make it up. When they make mistakes or hurt someone, they apologize. To the best of their ability, they mean well and act well. They prayed for and with my siblings and me when we were growing up, giving us a good foundation to a life that is really life. Trusting in God and being trustworthy.

Putting all my trust in God allows me to trust my insufficient self, imperfect neighbor, and this impermanent world. With all its heartache and wretchedness, with all its joy and peace – trust in this blessed life is possible because God holds it all in holiness. I can forgive and be forgiven. I can accept reality for what it is: the God given imperfect present.

When I don’t put my trust in God, I’m reduced to the uncertainty of riches – the shifting, shaky foundation that I will for myself. It may be tempting, but my parents raised me better than that. I’ve seen how to take hold of the life that is really life:  trusting in God and being trustworthy.

 

O Lord, I know not what to ask of thee. Thou alone knowest what are my true needs. Thou lovest me more than I myself know how to love. Help me to see my real needs which are concealed from me. I dare not ask either a cross or consolation. I can only wait on thee. My heart is open to thee. Visit and help me, for thy great mercy’s sake. Strike me and heal me, cast me down and raise me up. I worship in silence thy holy will and thine inscrutable ways. I offer myself as a sacrifice to thee. I put all my trust in thee. I have no other desire than to fulfil thy will. Teach me how to pray. Pray thou thyself in me.   Amen. (From A Manual of Eastern Orthodox Prayers, Crestwood, NY: St. Vladimir’s Seminary Press, 1991, p.24)

 About the Author of this prayer:

Metropolitan Philaret was the son of a Russian Orthodox priest who became a priest himself. He taught at St. Petersburg Theological Academy, and eventually became the Metropolitan of Moscow – a ranking somewhere between archbishop and patriarch. Not quite on par with the pope, but awfully close. He worked for offering scripture and other teachings in Russian so more people could read them. He wrote a catechism that is still in use.

Education, Meditation, Prayer, Theology

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Eleven

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I offer myself as a sacrifice to thee.

 There’s a difference between offering myself as a sacrifice to God and masochism:

Sacrifice to God deepens the spirit, making me more human, whole, and holy. When suffering is involved, it is redemptive. It is never pointless.

Masochism cripples body, mind and spirit; it’s inhumane, shattering, and an act against God’s gift of life. Self-inflicted suffering is an exercise of self hatred, not Godly love.

God grant me the wisdom to know the difference.

 

Biblical Reflection, Education, Meditation, Prayer

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Ten

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I worship in silence thy holy will and thine inscrutable ways.

 Inscrutable is the perfect word for this prayer. It means impossible to understand or interpret, and that’s just what the will of God is. Holy and inscrutable together remind me that I can trust in and accept God’s will. I don’t have to fear it because it is holy, and I can’t reduce it to my will because it’s inscrutable, beyond my comprehension. I can worship or reject God’s holy will and inscrutable ways, but why in silence? Can I pray in silence if I’m praying these words?

Silence is a rare thing these days. The world around us is so noisy, and it doesn’t stop when the sun goes down. There’s no such thing as an end to the day for television, computers, or phones. Appliances hum, leaf blowers start, and cars drive by with loud engines and louder stereo systems. Finding a place of outer silence requires intention.

Inner silence is even rarer. For most people, the mind is filled with constant chatter, distracting and exhausting. There is too much information to process, too many choices, and very few moments of peace. Inner silence requires intention and practice. It’s not easy and it can be scary, quieting the noise that drowns out God’s voice. Left alone and open to God without distraction removes the partial and false identities and reveals the true self – what God treasures most and what seems so inadequate.

Perhaps that’s why Philaret included “in silence” in this prayer. Only when I am before God, with no noise to distract me and no false identity to hide behind, can I feel God’s love for me and for all creation. Held by God, who is far beyond the small version of God I usually prefer, I can worship. When I am still, I know God is (Psalm 46:10). Not in the thunder or the storm, but in a still, small voice, I hear God (I Kings 19:11-13). In silence, inner and outer, God finds me. In silence, I am renewed.

 

O Lord, I know not what to ask of thee. Thou alone knowest what are my true needs. Thou lovest me more than I myself know how to love. Help me to see my real needs which are concealed from me. I dare not ask either a cross or consolation. I can only wait on thee. My heart is open to thee. Visit and help me, for thy great mercy’s sake. Strike me and heal me, cast me down and raise me up. I worship in silence thy holy will and thine inscrutable ways. I offer myself as a sacrifice to thee. I put all my trust in thee. I have no other desire than to fulfil thy will. Teach me how to pray. Pray thou thyself in me.   Amen. (From A Manual of Eastern Orthodox Prayers, Crestwood, NY: St. Vladimir’s Seminary Press, 1991, p.24)

 

About the Author of this prayer:

Metropolitan Philaret was the son of a Russian Orthodox priest who became a priest himself. He taught at St. Petersburg Theological Academy, and eventually became the Metropolitan of Moscow – a ranking somewhere between archbishop and patriarch. Not quite on par with the pope, but awfully close. He worked for offering scripture and other teachings in Russian so more people could read them. He wrote a catechism that is still in use. I suspect Philaret was a very busy man who had his share of difficulties.

Biblical Reflection, Education, Meditation, Prayer

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Nine

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Strike me and heal me, cast me down and raise me up.

 Just four lines ago, I prayed: I dare not ask either a cross or consolation. Am I now praying for both? If this line were taken alone, yes. It reads like a demand rather than a request. But it is one sentence among others, part of a larger whole – a handing over of personal agenda to the one who created me, as Jesus did before he was crucified. My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want. (Matthew 26:39). It’s the opposite of a demand, it’s a total surrender. Let it be with me what you will. I will not insist upon my own way, but I will trust that you hold me fast in hurt and relief, in humiliation and exaltation.

I’m not asking for trouble and I’m not asking for an easy life. I’m open to whatever comes because God will find me in all circumstances. In Yes, And: Daily Meditations, Richard Rohr points to the deeper truth behind this line:

Try to remember and give thanks for the good things even more than the bad, but learn from both of them. And most of all, as the prophet Baruch said, “Rejoice that you yourself are remembered by God.” (5:5)

(Cincinnati, OH: Franciscan Media, 2013, p.209)

Biblical Reflection, Education, Meditation, Prayer, Theology

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Eight

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Visit and help me, for thy great mercy’s sake.

 I visited strangers one year at Mercer Medical Center. I sat with them, talked with them, prayed with them, listened to them. I’d refill empty water glasses and remove food trays. Some were patients, some hospital staff, some were family or friends. I had the honor of hearing many life stories and the privilege of finding the Spirit awaiting my visit, already embracing the sick and the healthy. I saw enough pain to break my heart, and found enough grace to heal it.

I know that the Spirit is always present, so I don’t really need to ask God to visit; it’s asking for what’s already been given. But I misplace this truth  when I need it most. I’m so focused on what’s bothering me that I can’t see beyond it. So when I ask for God’s help and visitation, I’m really asking for God to remove my spiritual blindness. God is merciful, patiently giving me eyes to see what I already have.

Jesus visited and helped so many people during his time among us. He healed the sick, gave sight to the blind, and brought peace to the possessed. He restored lepers to their families and villages. He is the answer God gave to this prayer, and he comes to us today in the Spirit. This prayer is always answered.

Another wonderful thing: sometimes we are the answer to this prayer, sent by the Spirit. We have the honor of being the hands of Christ and the grace of serving the Christ we meet in those around us. We just don’t see it most of the time…

For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you gave me clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me. Then the righteous will answer him, “Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food, or thirsty and gave you something to drink? And when was it that we saw you a stranger and welcomed you, or naked and gave you clothing? And when was it that we saw you sick or in prison and visited you?” And the king will answer them, “Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.” (Matthew 25:35-40)

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will

O Lord, I know not what to ask of thee. Thou alone knowest what are my true needs. Thou lovest me more than I myself know how to love. Help me to see my real needs which are concealed from me. I dare not ask either a cross or consolation. I can only wait on thee. My heart is open to thee. Visit and help me, for thy great mercy’s sake. Strike me and heal me, cast me down and raise me up. I worship in silence thy holy will and thine inscrutable ways. I offer myself as a sacrifice to thee. I put all my trust in thee. I have no other desire than to fulfil thy will. Teach me how to pray. Pray thou thyself in me.   Amen. (From A Manual of Eastern Orthodox Prayers, Crestwood, NY: St. Vladimir’s Seminary Press, 1991, p.24)

 

About the Author of this prayer:

Metropolitan Philaret was the son of a Russian Orthodox priest who became a priest himself. He taught at St. Petersburg Theological Academy, and eventually became the Metropolitan of Moscow – a ranking somewhere between archbishop and patriarch. Not quite on par with the pope, but awfully close. He worked for offering scripture and other teachings in Russian so more people could read them. He wrote a catechism that is still in use. I suspect Philaret was a very busy man who had his share of difficulties.

Biblical Reflection, Education, Meditation, Prayer, Theology

Prayer for the Acceptance of God’s Will: Line Seven

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My heart is open to thee.

      Having a heart open to God is a major inconvenience. I can’t pursue my own ends to the exclusion of those around me, and I question the ends I would pursue. There is no way I can act as if my ends justify my means, especially when the spirits of others and the entire created world live with the consequences, always and everywhere. With an open heart, I live with the sure and complete knowledge that God’s love for others equals God’s love for me, and that God will provide a way for me to walk kindly through the places and years given to me. But it’s a lot of work and little glory, living with a heart that sees what is good: and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God (Micah 6:8). So I don’t live with a heart open to God most of the time. It’s why I have to pray for it; I can’t do this without God. An open heart is a gift and a responsibility, loving world and self with every talent and shortcoming, through intentional action and purposeful inaction.

The psalmist put it in these words: Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me (Ps. 51:10). I know enough to be careful what I pray for, because I’ll surely get it. It won’t look the way I expect it to – God is constant, but not predictable. And not hindered by my lack of imagination. Then I can’t pretend I don’t know the truth: the life God has given me isn’t just sufficient, it’s extraordinary and holy.