Help me in all things to rely upon thy holy will.
My calendar holds a month of days, and I write into each day the times and places that require my attention. Appointments, birthdays, and deadlines crop up in pen and pencil variety. Then there are the things that don’t appear – activities so much a part of my life that I need no reminder. Things seen and unseen fill my days and require my willing attention. Some of them I enjoy, some not so much, but my will moves them from intentions to actions. My will is part of every act and activity. I do not control the universe, but I am responsible for how I act in my little corner of it.
Self reliance is something I value, but if I’m honest, I can do very few things without relying on others. I don’t produce food, clothing, and shelter for myself and my family – those things necessary for life. Every day is dependent on the good willing of others, some known and many unknown to me, for more things than I can name. My will is integral to living responsibly in this place and time, and it’s limited.
Holy will is the unlimited source of creation. God willed existence for every single atom in the cosmos. Nothing is outside God’s holy will: it is the foundation for all that is. I can’t grasp this will, and I can’t see its parameters. When I pray these words, I’m not asking for God’s intervention in my activities, I’m asking for God to hold me fast in the vastness of space and time. The universe is so big, and I am so small. Knowing that creation is God’s holy will, and that I can rely upon it, is not a loss of control. It’s the gift of life without despair.